Getting a message at 5:30 pm on a Friday inviting you to go climbing for the weekend can lead you to a sunrise on the road, heading to a nearby destination — a "wall."
Come prepared to learn a rock climbing lesson led by certified guide-instructor Lean "the German" Sheurle and his assistant — star? — Fer "soydeArgentinaExtrema" Robledo. After a theoretical-instructive presentation on two new topics to study:
Chapter I: "The Wonderful World of Knots"
Chapter II: "Introduction to Carabiner Basics"
Go ahead and put on the right gear, and enjoy the world of climbing.
Always make sure to look for good instructors — encouraging, willing, motivating, with the enthusiasm needed to make your time on the rock unforgettable:
-"I'm not lowering you until you reach the anchor!"
-"You're-not-coming-down"
-"Extreeeeme rappel!"
And before reaching the destination, you don't need to worry about your fellow travelers. During your stay you'll find characters like...
Pili and her girly pink Nalgene bottle.
Sofi and her "short" steps on the high rocks.
Leti and her international wool hats and pom-poms.
Cheche and his special cheese menu.
Meli and her climber belly, the event's official hype squad.
And Rochi, well... as you'll notice, is the one writing this.
When it comes to lodging and food, the guide and his assistant take care of it. They'll set you up with cozy sleeping quarters and showers that — attentive reader — I suggest you read the instruction manual attached at the end before using.
For dinner? You'll have a classic asado (grilled meat) plus grilled vegetables (also known as the "veggie asado").
Be sure to bring warm clothes, comfortable gear, and above all, good vibes.
As for your personal problems, don't worry. According to the assistant, you've arrived at just the right place to forget them for a while... or toss them into the void from the highest rock you can find.
Future traveler, welcome to your first sport climbing course, welcome to "Los Difuntos" — we guarantee you an excellent stay... alive and kicking.
The day dawned chilly, lots of fleece, lots of mate, we kept up the debate over names for the future little Sheurle-Rappo baby, and thanks to the only little market that was open, we had a second breakfast with medialunas.
Getting to the trail in the middle of the road, walking it, climbing it, scrambling up it, and singing songs along the lines of: "I saw you... you had a harness and a carabiner... and I just saw you..." made the warm-up intense and fun.
Pili set the routes, Fer and Lean made sure everything was in order, Meli prepared her master class, and the rest of us... well... we took some amazing photos!
The day went on with its crazy rainy-sunny-who-knows weather, and words flowed like a waterfall. It's said that, out there in the Sierras de los Difuntos, some great speeches were overheard, like:
-Want to know what a crack is? Simple — it's a falcon who got drunk and ended up skidding across a bar at 3 am on a Saturday.
And... who said, who said... "I'm HYPER straight"??
Let's not forget the benefits of climbing. We should remember it's not only great physical exercise, mental clarity, focus, and camaraderie, but also... a great pick-up line generator. Here's your basic course in climbing-world flirting:
"Watch my b.....!!"
"G...... to the wall"
"Wanna make out?"
"I'll wait for you at the anchor"
"I like getting on my knees"
Rough... but that's how it is, ladies and gentlemen, the climber's life.
As the afternoon rolled in, the whole climbing crew felt right at home — going up and down was routine, laughter was the most sought-after ingredient, and enjoying nature was the best idea of all.
End of the trip: back to the cars and letting the drive home go by. Carrying in your backpack a kilo of memories, two liters of anecdotes, a thousand grams of new friends, and 100cm of climbing technique... (and a few apples left over that nobody wanted to take...) — the little perks of a traveler.
Until new walls, always!!
WITH LOVE FOR THE CLIMBING CREW — MORE ALIVE AND KICKING THAN "DIFUNTOS" (THE DEPARTED)!!
Rochi
